Analyze THAT! by The Pioneer Woman

I was awake at 2:00 am last night for no reason, then finally drifted off to sleep again at 3:30. As often happens following a middle-of-the-night bout of insomnia, the dreams that followed were vivid and extremely weird. I am well aware of how obnoxious it is when someone tries to relay his/her dream to others who did not experience the same dream, but I have to get this out so I can move on with my daily work. Thank you for indulging me. If you stop reading now, I understand. In fact, I encourage it.
I dreamed I was lying in the chair of an endodontist in Cincinnati. She was informing me that she had to pull out one of my teeth, and that the new tooth she would put in its place would be a subtle shade of green, and this would only be visible if I were on TV. “But…I am on TV,” I responded. So she replied that the only other option would be charcoal grey. I tried to respond that I’ll just keep the bum tooth I had and take my chances, but she had already administered a numbing agent and she thought I said “Okay, I’ll go with the charcoal option.”
The extraction forceps were headed toward my tooth when I heard the voice of an ex-boyfriend from high school. He was in the waiting room at the same Cincinnati endodontist, and had heard my protestations about being on TV and not wanting a green tooth. He recognized my voice, so he came to the doorway of my exam room and struck up a conversation with me, and I had to try to look and act charming while the endodontist’s extraction forceps were clamping around my bum tooth.
Soon the waiting room had filled with three other boys I had dated in my past. I won’t name any names, because I am friends with all of them today, and I don’t want their wives to know that I was dreaming that they were at my endodontic appointment. Not that their wives would feel threatened by this, I just don’t want them to know how weird I am. But basically the gist of this is that I ran into all my ex-boyfriends at once, and instead of making sure I looked as good as I could possibly look, I was getting one of my teeth pulled with a really numb face.
When I got home from my Cincinnati trip, I discovered that I had forgotten to tell a construction crew not to show up and renovate my house, and everything was covered with tarps and there were contractors everywhere. Then I heard Ladd’s voice saying “Honey…honey…” and then I woke up. Seems I had overslept and my phone was on silent and he’d had to drive home from feeding cattle to wake me up. I’ve never been so glad to see my husband in my entire life.
So please forgive me if I’m a little off today.
My tooth is feeling a little sore…

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